The short answer: the best questions to ask a medium are open questions that leave room for your loved one to come through in their own way, such as “Are they at peace?”, “Is there anything they want me to know?” and “Do they have a message for the family?” Hold back names and details at the start so the medium can describe who’s coming through first; that evidence is what makes the messages meaningful. Prepare 5 to 10 questions in order of importance, book about 30 minutes for a full sitting, and choose chat if you’d like a written record you can re-read.
| Purpose | Example questions |
|---|---|
| Evidence | ”Can you describe who’s coming through?” “How did they pass?” |
| Peace | ”Are they at peace?” “Are they with anyone from the family?” |
| Messages | ”Is there anything they want me to know?” “Do they have a message for my mother?” |
| Unfinished business | ”Do they know I’m sorry?” “Did they hear what I said at the end?” |
| Signs | ”Have they been sending me signs?” “What sign can I look for?” |
| Guidance | ”What would they want for me now?” “Do they support this decision?” |
Before You Ask Anything: What to Share and What to Keep Back
Share at the start:
- That you’d like to connect with someone who has passed (you don’t need to say who).
- Your first name, if the medium asks.
- That you’ll answer yes or no to confirm details.
Keep back until later:
- The person’s name, relationship to you, and how they died.
- Specific memories you hope to hear about.
Letting the medium describe who’s there first means that when they mention your grandmother’s garden, her laugh, or the way she always called you “duck”, you’ll know it came from the connection, not from you. Good mediums welcome this. If your loved one doesn’t come through first, it’s fine to say who you hoped to hear from later in the sitting.
40 Questions to Ask a Medium
Questions that bring evidence
- Can you describe the person who’s coming through?
- How are they related to me?
- What was their personality like?
- How did they pass?
- Can you tell me something only they and I would know?
- Is there a name, initial or nickname coming through?
- What do they want me to know about their life?
- Are they showing you a place, object or memory?
Questions about their passing and peace
- Are they at peace?
- Were they in pain at the end?
- Did they know I was there?
- Was anyone waiting for them when they crossed over?
- Who are they with now?
- Are they happy where they are?
Messages
- Is there anything they want me to know?
- Do they have a message for my family, or for someone specific?
- What do they want me to remember about them?
- Is there something they never got to say?
- What would they say about how I’m doing?
Unfinished business and healing
- Do they know I’m sorry?
- Have they forgiven me, and have I forgiven them?
- Did they hear what I said at the funeral, or at the end?
- Do they understand why I couldn’t be there?
- Is there anything they’d like me to do for them?
Family
- Are they watching over the children or grandchildren?
- Do they have a message for my mother, father or partner?
- Are they with our other family members who’ve passed?
- Were they at the wedding, birth or celebration we just had?
Pets
- Is my pet with them?
- Is my pet at peace?
- Does my pet know how much they were loved?
Signs
- Have they been sending me signs?
- Was that [song, cardinal, coin, dream] from them?
- What sign can I look for to know they’re near?
- Did they visit me in my dream?
Guidance for your life
- What would they want for me now?
- Do they support the decision I’m facing?
- Do they have any advice about my relationship or career?
- Are they happy that I’m moving forward?
- Is there anything they want me to let go of?
Questions to Save for Other Professionals
Mediums focus on connection, comfort and messages. For medical diagnoses, legal matters, financial decisions or predictions of death or illness, speak with the relevant professional; many mediums decline these topics by policy (for example, Quietsound on Kasamba keeps health, legal and pregnancy questions off-limits).
How a Sitting Usually Unfolds
- Opening. The medium may say a short prayer or take a moment to connect.
- Evidence. They describe who’s coming through: personality, appearance, how they passed, memories. You confirm with yes or no.
- Messages. Once the connection is clear, they pass on what your loved one wants to say.
- Your questions. You ask what matters most.
- Closing. Often a final message of love.
Sometimes a different loved one comes through first, perhaps someone with something important to say. It’s worth staying open; the person you hoped for often follows.
How Long to Book, and What It Costs
A full sitting usually takes about 30 minutes: time for evidence, messages and your questions. Online, the median medium in our audit charges $5.45 a minute (74 mediums on Kasamba, Purple Garden and Keen), so a 30-minute sitting costs about $163.50 at standard rates, or $84.73 on Kasamba, $119.70 on Purple Garden or $175.75 on Keen as a first sitting at each platform’s median medium rate with its welcome offer. Full breakdown: how much does a medium reading cost?
Chat, phone or video? Chat gives you a transcript (Kasamba saves every chat reading); phone feels more personal; video, on Purple Garden, lets you see your medium.
Mediums We’d Ask These Questions
- Spirit Amy (Kasamba, $12.99/min chat): clairvoyant and clairaudient medium; 49,727 readings with a 99.9% approval ledger.
- Ambers Light (Kasamba, $6.99/min chat): grief, closure and “are they in a safe place” questions.
- Tattooed Psychic (Purple Garden, $7.99/min chat): works with no back story, ideal if you want pure evidence; 51,404 readings.
- Niki Medium (Purple Garden, $5.49/min chat): fourth-generation medium with a perfect 5.0.
- Jeanne Clock (Keen, $15.99/min): clairvoyant, clairaudient, empath and medium; 95,000+ readings since 2007.
Full ranking: best online psychic mediums. Platform lists: Kasamba, Keen, Purple Garden.
After the Sitting
- Re-read or write down everything while it’s fresh, including details you didn’t recognise. Many people later find a family member who confirms them.
- Share messages with the family members they were meant for.
- Watch for signs in the days that follow (signs from deceased loved ones).
- Give yourself time. Sittings can bring up strong feelings; be gentle with yourself.
Frequently Asked Questions
What should I ask a medium?
Open questions work best: “Are they at peace?”, “Is there anything they want me to know?”, “Do they have a message for my family?” and “Have they been sending me signs?” Prepare 5 to 10 questions in order of importance.
What should you not tell a medium?
Keep back your loved one’s name, relationship to you and how they died at the start, so the medium can describe who’s coming through first. You can share more later in the sitting.
How do I prepare for a medium reading?
Choose who you hope to connect with, write your questions in order of importance, find a quiet space, book about 30 minutes, and choose chat if you’d like a transcript.
What if the person I want doesn’t come through?
Sometimes another loved one comes through first. Stay open; the person you hoped for often follows, and you can tell the medium who you’d like to hear from later in the sitting.
How long should a medium reading be?
About 30 minutes for a full sitting, which gives time for the medium to establish evidence, pass on messages and answer your questions.
Can I ask a medium about my pet?
Yes. Many mediums connect with pets who have passed. Ask whether your pet is at peace or is with a loved one. See also pet psychic readings.
Related Guides
- How much does a medium reading cost?
- Signs from deceased loved ones
- Dreams about deceased loved ones
- Best online psychic mediums
- Questions to ask a psychic
The best evidential mediums online for connecting with a late husband or wife — dedicated mediums with specific, checkable track records, what they cost, and how to protect yourself while grieving.
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